For Not Truly Seeing You

I've been thinking about how I've treated you, and I can't pretend anymore that I didn't know better. I did know better. I just wasn't brave enough or thoughtful enough to act like it. The truth is, I wasn't really seeing you — not the way you deserved to be seen. I was caught up in my own head, my own needs, and I let that become an excuse for how I've hurt you.

You gave me your heart and I took it for granted in ways that make me sick when I think about them now. I can see the weight of that in your eyes, and knowing that I put it there is something I'm going to carry with me. I'm genuinely sorry, Kavya. Not because I got caught or because things fell apart, but because I finally understand what I've done — and how much it cost you.

I don't expect you to just forgive me because I'm sorry now. That's not how this works. What I'm asking for is the chance to show you, over time, that I can be different. That I can actually see you — your fears, your needs, the things that matter to you. You deserve someone who does that without having to be broken first.

I love you, and I'm sorry it took losing you to realize what I was losing.